Not the Brothers Karamazov







The Troll Diaries


The following books have been referred to as the Troll Diaries since they were written during a concerted trolling campaign against us. The trolls are still trolling us to this day. When people have no lives, trolling is what keeps them occupied. Sad. As everyone knows, trolling is produced by deep self-loathing, which is then projected onto others. We hate trolls, but the people who most hate trolls are the trolls themselves! Sad squared.




The Illuminist Army by [Abaris, Brother] 

The Illuminist Army 

"You take the blue pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes." - Morpheus, The Matrix

What's the point of this choice of pills? It's about whether you want Truth or Lies. The remarkable thing is that although most people believe they would take the red pill, in fact most of them are addicted to the blue pill. They can't do without it. They are Cyphers, not Neos.

The Truth is not human. The Truth preceded humanity, and will survive humanity. It has nothing to do with humanity. The moment you try to find a Truth that's appealing to humans, and, especially, to you personally, you have admitted that you want to shape the Truth in your image, and you don't want the Truth as it is in itself, wholly independent of humans and their beliefs, opinions, tastes and feelings. The Truth doesn't come to you. You have to go to it. And you have to go as the humblest of supplicants, and the most impartial and disinterested of enquirers. You must never be partisan, eager for the Truth to have such and such a character.

There are two armies in the world: The Enlightened Army and the Endarkened Army ... the Army of Reason and the Army of Unreason, the Army of Truth and the Army of the Lie.

Which army will you join? What's your sacred cause - the single, objective Truth, or the subjective "all truths" = "all lies"?

Only one army is fighting to clear the way to the Truth ... the Illuminist Army. Everywhere, we are surrounded by the Forces of Darkness, the armies of the Lie.

Nothing is more feared than the Truth for the simple reason that the Truth isn't what people want it to be, and they can't bear it. People want the Truth to be created in their own image, serving their own agenda. The last thing they want is to have to work out what the Truth is and then accommodate its agenda, which is nothing at all to do with them.

Only the greatest heroes - the Grail Knights - can find the Truth. The Grail Knights are the vanguard of the Illuminist Army. Will you join us?


The Citizen Army by [Spartacus, Brother] 

The Citizen Army

The Citizen Army is a collection of contributions by members of the online Illuminist community who were brave enough to take part in Project Spartacus. Their work is accompanied by an extensive commentary by the AC/GS team.

This book shows that the online Illuminist community has enough talent and energy to form the vanguard of a genuine Citizen Army to carry forward the great cause of bringing about a Second and Final meritocratic Enlightenment, a true Age of Reason, based on the Principle of Sufficient Reason, expressed through ontological mathematics.


Illuminism Contra Discordianism by [Cato, Brother] 

 Illuminism Contra Discordianism

"Philosophy is a battle against the bewitchment of our intelligence by means of language." - Wittgenstein

We use language to think, to talk to each other, to write, to form beliefs, religions, philosophies, and so on. But what if we are using the wrong language? Do we have "wrong thoughts" because we are using the wrong language? Do we have wrong religions and philosophies for exactly the same reason?

What's the right language? If we could find the right language, could we then think correctly, without error, without delusion, without fantasy? Would the right language give us the right religion, the right philosophy? Would it explain reality to us?

Terence McKenna said, "The syntactical nature of reality, the real secret of magic, is that the world is made of words. And if you know the words that the world is made of, you can make of it whatever you wish."

Is reality made of language? Is it made of words? Why not numbers? 2,500 years ago, Pythagoras said, "All things are numbers."

Pythagoras was the first Grand Master of the Hyperboreans, now known as the Illuminati. Throughout history, a war has raged between the Illuminati - the forces of reason and order - and the Discordians - the forces of unreason and disorder ("Chaos").

This book shows how reality is based on ontological syntax and semantics (the rational antidotes to "Chaos"), conveyed via numbers, and how Discordianism represents a catastrophic failure to understand ontological mathematics, leading to innumerable subjectivist and relativist fallacies, and the wholesale denial of Knowledge and Truth.

The struggle between the Illuminati and the Discordians (in all their forms) is the most important there is. The soul of humanity is at stake. The Truth itself is the prize to be won or lost.










The Dunciad 

"When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him." - Jonathan Swift

"Never argue with stupid people. They'll drag you down to their level..." - Mark Twain

This is a book about stupid people. Dunces are everywhere. They are infecting the world with their ignorance, their irrationalism, their illogic. They are blocking human evolution. There is no more pressing question for smart people than what to do about the idiots. The intelligent cannot succeed while the unintelligent are wrecking everything, dragging everything down to the lowest common denominator, manically racing to the bottom.

This subject is nothing new. All intelligent people have always been aware of the dreadful force of stupidity, which has, if truth be told, been the most powerful and ubiquitous force in human history, to the extreme detriment of humanity.

A modern expression of this moronic force is trolling, whereby anomic retards try to sabotage and mock all things high-minded and intelligent.

This book is an exploration - through case studies of real trolls - of the modern phenomenon of vicious, sadistic, cretinous trolling.

The 18th century expert on dunces and trolls was the English poet Alexander Pope. In his mock-epic The Dunciad, he mercilessly satirized the stupid people all around him.

We shall use his work as a starting point for our adventure into the underworld of dim, dull, dense people. Without fail, these idiots manifest the Dunning-Kruger effect: they all suffer from an astonishing superiority complex. Their own estimation of their abilities bears no resemblance to the objective reality of their meagre and usually non-existent talents.

We shall delve into The Dunciad to show how all of its central themes and concerns are even more pressing in today's world.


"Satire is a kind of glass, wherein beholders do generally discover everybody's face but their own." - Jonathan Swift